The word ‘ego’ brings to mind the image of someone who is too full of themselves and cannot handle the slightest insult. But ego can be both dominant or dormant that can turn people into either sharks or doormats. And neither of these two is healthy for your relationship. In fact, it can get in the way of a successful relationship. People with a dominant ego often find themselves in conflict for the sake of conflict. And those who cannot express themselves get the short end of the stick and may feel dissatisfied. So, here’s more about how pride affects relationships.
When you or someone in your life has a dominant ego
There are various ways how pride affects relationships. But when a person’s ego is dominating, they tend to find faults in others. Here are a few behavioural patterns you may find in a person with a dominant ego. This is how pride affects relationships when it is dormant.
Playing the blame game
To hide insecurities, such people may come across as bullies with no regard for other people’s feelings. They are happy to blame others for their failure and shortcomings. In a long-term relationship, they may destroy the other person’s confidence, or cause them to become rebellious. This is often observed in spousal and parent-child relationships.
Wanting to have the last word
Some people just cannot let an argument rest! They just feel the need to prove a point, because not doing so is a blow to their self-worth. Such an attitude can affect work relationships and cause sensitive negotiations to break down.
Putting others down
For some people, putting others down and covering it up as a joke, is a way to make snide comments that won’t be offensive. And at the same time feel superior about themselves. This behaviour indicates that there are aspects of the relationship that the person is unhappy with. And is unable to communicate this in the right way.
It isn’t just a dominant ego that is an issue. Even people who cannot express themselves in their fullness find themselves in trouble.
This is how pride affects relationships when someone has a dormant ego
Play the victim card
These people are always suffering because of other people. They are unable to take ownership of their actions which leads them to become judgemental and hypocritical. Hard as it is to accept, it is important to nip this habit in the bud and take charge of your life.
Feel jealous
Jealousy is an unhealthy emotion that people feel sometimes. The constant attitude of ‘I’m not OK-you’re OK’ can make you miserable, and also make it tough for other people to share their happiness with you.
Fear rejection
A mortal fear of rejection often prevents people with a weak ego from trying anything at all. As a result, they live a sub-par life and never take risks. Needless to say, this is a highly unsatisfactory way to live, and will soon begin taking a toll on you. Even the people around you will want to avoid a self-deprecating person who simply cannot do anything.
Do you associate strongly with any of these aspects? Has a close friend or family member pointed them out to you? The first step is acceptance. From a place of loving acceptance, you can work on the issues that cause you to be unhappy, and fix them.
Read more: Leading by example: The art and science of being a good leader
