If I asked you, what are the best things about yourself, what would your answer be? Would you take it well if someone complimented you on them? We’re all so wired to look for the things that are negative and bad that we end up overlooking the good. And while many have spoken about the green flags to keep an eye out for in relationships and friendships, what happens when we turn the focus inwards?
Self-compassion comes naturally to some while for some, it’s extremely difficult. Not everyone grew up in an accepting environment where self-acceptance and compassion were encouraged. However, this doesn’t mean that these qualities cannot be acquired and taught. Self-compassion is treating yourself with encouragement and understanding, just like how you would treat a friend. We’re often hardest on ourselves, pushing ourselves down to raise ourselves up. But this practice can be more detrimental than successful. Those who don’t practice self-compassion end up blaming themselves for things that aren’t even their fault. How can we combat this thought process? By acknowledging our green flags.
What Are Green Flags?
Green flags, as the name suggests, are positive signifiers within yourself or others. Just like in a relationship, green flags indicate that your connection with yourself has the potential to flourish into a safe, healthy, and lasting relationship. Before you try and build a bond with someone else, you need to focus on building a healthy connection with yourself. Green flags can help you identify how far you’ve come along in your journey. When we identify the attributes, we prioritise within ourselves, we can build better relationships with the people around us.
Why Is It Important To Recognise Our Own Green Flags?
Recognising the good in ourselves is, of course, a much-needed ego boost, but it can also help develop wider emotional quotient. Being self-aware helps us know ourselves, our triggers, and helps us respond to situations in a more informed manner. We reflect on our behaviour and analyse if the consequences align with our character.
8 Green Flags You Should Look For In Yourself
1. You keep promises to yourself.
Maybe your goal is to exercise 4 times a week, maybe it is to journal daily. When you follow through with your commitments to yourself, you build confidence and trust within yourself.
2. You treat yourself with kindness.
You need to be your number one supporter, even when others don’t believe in you. Self-kindness starts with showing yourself support and understanding instead of being harshly critical or judgmental.
3. You respect your boundaries.
The lines you draw for yourself ensure your comfort and safety. Not allowing others to disrespect you and holding people accountable for crossing those lines can ensure you’re appreciating your individuality.
4. You choose quality over quantity.
When it comes to friendships, plans, commitments, anything, and everything, you need to choose quality over quantity. It ensures that you’re surrounding yourself with positive vibrations and pulling yourself out of situations and relationships that drain you.
5. You choose the path that’s best for you.
The “right” path can differ from person to person. However, if you’re following something that calls out to you, and aligns with your values and beliefs, you’re on the right path.
6. You allow yourself to feel.
There is no such thing as “good” or “bad” emotions. Allowing yourself to feel everything and not bottling your feelings up can help you accept your emotions and let them go when they no longer serve you. Always remember that your feelings don’t define you.
7. You listen to yourself and others.
Listening takes patience and time to master. Self-compassion allows you to listen to yourself as well as others without judgment. When you’re listening to others, you do it while hearing them instead of waiting for your turn to speak.
8. You accommodate your needs.
Many people are so busy meeting the needs of other people, they are clueless about their own. Meeting our own needs is the key to happiness, if not, it can lead to emotional pain. Practicing self-care without the fear of being selfish is what will make you feel happy, grateful, safe, loved, and calm.
When you’re so caught up in what other people think of you, aligning with your values and recognising what brings you joy can be difficult. Take the time to get back in touch with yourself and remind yourself of the green flags you see inside to live a happy and healthy life.
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